Into A D e e p Ocean

D O W N

So right now 4.24 A.M I can't sleep. Maybe I've an insomnia I guess? --'

so I've been thinking a lot of things sampai tak lalu nak makan, want to be alone, susah nak tidur. Ive mental break down. I've distance from many people including my partner. I just tired from acting good. I just tired of everything.

So I woke up every day with the same questions in my mind, what I'm supposed to do right now?

I don't even trust and love myself anymore.

So I really need time and space.

*I put my hand on my chest and feel the heart beat, "things gonna be alright-if love is around.

I'll love myself again. Inshallah

Me,
Quen.

Tired of everything.

KL Lepark

Salam and hai all my fellas!

4:18 am and yah! I'm still wide awake after a long journey from KL to my hometown. Cuti TIGA HARI SAHAJA GUYS
Erk haha, actually KL-Perak x de lah jauh sngat, tapi disebabkan jammed tadi so it took 7 hour jugak lah nak sampai rumah. Oh well! Alhamdulillah. *Be grateful for small things, big things and everything in between* so yah!!

Haha, okay back to the main purpose I'm posting this entry is *omaigod sorry I'm so excited to share this story* uhuk! Okay. Ckp melayu la sister. Kayy draggg lah lagi drag!! Bila nk start crita ni !!?? HAHA okay cmni !

FRIDAY 10:00PM

Anis : So guys, siapa nak follow kl lepark esok ni?

Aku *uuu, ape je ada kt kl lepark tu, and srsly time tu aku blur and decide utk pergi pun sbb aku ni jenis member pelawa gi mana-mana, aku org first yg paling rajin nk ikut. Tak tahu kenapa, mungkin nak jaga hati,mungkin x sanggup nk tolak dan mungkin jugak sbb aku suka berjalan haha. Dan satunya lagi benda paling sedih sekali time duit aku cuma ada 50 ringgit je utk hidup.

Sodiq dan aku : Aku follow !

SABTU 9:00AM

Aku : Anis, kt sana nanti ada apa je? *sambil search kt ig hashtag #kllepark2017

Anis : oh kat sana dy ad bukak booth2 buku cmtu, buku2 jenis awk suka like fixi pastu ada gig.

Aku : gig tu apa? *inesen kan masa tu --'

Anis : dy mcm konsert gitu, band2 underground tp ni dy buat open space

Aku : oh.ok


****** 11.00 AM *******

KTMB, Bangi ----> Bank Negara, jalan kaki lintas sogo, then sampai >Parkson<KL Lepark>

|| KL Lepark ||

To be continued hehe.....

Sharing is Caring ❤️

"When your partner/friend getting down."

Assalamualaikum and slmt malam. Here's a little thing I want to share with you guys if you are in this situation.

Em, I don't mind if you not really agree with mine because it was just my opinion. Okay so "when your partner/friend feel bad.. or something like..."ughhhh, aku tak layak utk kau , aku jahat and lain2"

You just tell her/he

Come on ! Over in your life, you don't want to stay in same level or same stage for the rest of your life right? You need to go up and down as well. Iman tu naik turun so amalan kita ada kadangnya baik ada kadangnya buruk. Stop push yourself like "Oh! I'm bad I'm bad! " pastu you feel down.. stop blaming yourself. What you get if you don't stop it? You feel better? No right?

It supposed to be an encouragement for you to go up and you improve yourself better. And then you don't compare yourself with me. We are both different. You are guy and I'm a girl.

So our limitations and emm apa yang kita capable buat tu different. So if you know that you're responsibility as a men is bigger then me as a girl which mean that you're a men who gonna lead my life, then you should be better lah. Just show me that, you know... prove me wrong la like you can do better, you can improve haa. Jangan lah compare because kita insan yang berbeza.. so sometimes you ad kelebihan you, I ada kelebihan I sendiri. Like you don't compare an apple to apple because we not same. So you are orange and I'm an apple. So jangan compare. It gonna be like macam.. tak cantik gituuu.

I know you can do better.

Okay dah. That's all. I hope you feel better after read this.

Me, Adibah Alias. 💙

New Semester !

"Terima kasih pakcik."

Duit dan senyuman Aku beri. Pintu teksi Aku tutup. Terus masuk pagar asrama. Bag Aku banyak dia tak kelakar, siapa yang nak tolong angkat ni. Kau angkat pejam mata je Nuraa, inshaAllah sampai jugak bilik. Paling koman pun kau lenguh-lenguh tangan je. Okay! Tak de hal laa.

Okay kejap ! Kunci  bilik semua tak settle lagi, Aku lupa nak print siap-siap borang reserve bilik. Boleh dikatakan juga aku tak prepare sangat pun untuk nak langkah masuk sem ni. Selalu semangat je, tapi entah lah.. nak masuk semester tujuh ni rasa berat sangat. Untuk sem ni Aku hanya ambil satu subjek je , satu kelas.. kau rasa?

Aku terus call Isra..

"Israaaaa! Kau ada kat bilik tak? Aku takdak kunci la, tak ambil lagi.."

"Haha kau ni, bagi lah salam dulu kot ye pun, Aku tak sampai lagi ni , Aku rasa dah ada orang kat rumah tu. Cubalah kau bagi salam ketuk pintu."

Ohhh, okay Isra tak sampai lagi, so takpelah Aku try la tengok dulu rumah ada orang ke tak. Harap-harap lah ada.

--------------------------------

"Assalamualaikum... errrr hai, saya Nur.. hehe".

Aku senyum dan salam dengan ahli rumah p7 1103B yang belum Aku kenali lagi  , kunci kemesraan orang kata. Nama Balqis, dia balas senyuman Aku. Okay cun.  Aku terus menuju ke bilik.

Yes! 'Bilik ada tingkap' , maksudnya takde lah berkuap dan suram nanti. Hal ini lah yang Aku paling risau. Lepas dah settle unpacking, Isra sampai !! Yeah Israaaaa! Rindunya...

"Assalamualaikum! Nuraaa ya Allah.. wei, sihat? "

"Alhamdulillah ofkos lah sihat dah jumpa kau ni ha."

"Weh Nuraa, kau ada tinggal apa-apa tak kt rumah kau?"

"Tinggal apa dia? Haha rasanya takda apa-apa yang tinggal."

"Laaa kenapa tak tinggal......"

"Tinggal apa dia ya Allah, kau ni jangan lah bagi Aku cuak."

"TINGGALKAN CINTA YANG DITOLAK TU, CINTA YANG TAK DIBALAS TU KAT RUMAH, BAWAK DATANG SEMANGAT BARU, CINTA BARU UNTUK KEJAR HAFAZAN, HAHAHA"

"Weiiiiiii !! Kau kan.. haaa sehari tak bagi Aku sentap tak boleh ke... belum start sem lagi nii haaa kau ni, nasib sayang je."

"Hahaha ye ye, takyah lah gelabah, hahaha okay2 jom tidur haha."

Kurang hasam  betul kawan Aku ni,  dah la jom tidur, dah takda mood nk teruskan penulisan ni ciss..

||05 Mei 2017|| 5.53 A.M ||

Q&A

Baru-baru ni kena soal dengan my friend. Dia tanya :

'Cough'.   kenapa mesti soalan ni?

"Pernah kena confess? And if pernah, what is your answer?"

Aku tinggalkan soalan tak dijawab.

Insomnia.

So here, jawapan yang awk tanya.

Em. But i'm going to write what is actually I really want to say. Not to tell what's the answer. Can I? hm

"Aku suka kau" - Him

what's actually I REALLY want to say :-

"Okay. Terima kasih.

If you are serious, the door are waiting for you to come. With my pleasure, please come home. Ask my dad. I'll be wait. Thats all ." 💙

Then if he ask :

"Kau suka aku?"

what?

Em. the question I never kena tanya before.And I hate this question. why? Sebab segan nak jawab. And tak reti hm. 🔪

what is actually I want he to know :-

"Sebenarnya aku tk berapa yakin love before marriage." 

yes. Tapi aku cuma tanya, kau suka aku ke tak? (if)

"Okay 😌 . If you really like me, you should be waiting for the perfect time (after nikah) and inshaAllah you will get the answer."

'Perempuan' -> complicated

p/s :

Hm sorry. Aku bukan apa. Berbalik pada prinsip aku sebenar. Aku cuma nak menjaga for the right person. For the choosen one. Tak berniat nak kecewakan. Andai hati ini boleh dibaca, mahu sahaja aku belah kemudian beri utk dikhatamkan. InshaAllah pasti jumpa perkataan yang dicari.

But sayangnya, HATI.

Antara Allah dengan hambanya.

Berbalik kepada prinsip. Setiap drpd kita ada prinsip bukan? Jangan kerana seseorang yang kita suka (before nikah), prinsip kita jadi terkapai-kapai. Barangkali sudah hanyut.

Jangan sayang...

Kawal nafs.

And if betul2 suka, pendam dulu.

Setia. Tunggu.

Jangan putus doa. Moga Allah jaga dia utk kita.

Moga berjodohan.

okay. Goodluck 💪🏻

👆🏻Self reminder 😌

Moga terjawab soalan yang ditanya.